To understand what it is I think.
You will have to push yourself to the brink.
Go to where sanity melts.
Take two more steps and release everything else.
Gaze deeper into the abyss.
Embrace your nightmares with a coppery kiss.
Withstand the tornado of questions in your mind.
limbs crushed and twisted from the ties that bind.
Forget all you are and what you want.
Go through the motions like a robotic savant.
Not really living but not quite dead.
Hoping anxiety does not bring its paralyzing dread.
Praying each day will be different than the last.
Just one moment to give a small chance.
Pray Something happens to fill you with rage.
Maybe that will give the strength to break free from your cage.
Deep in your soul you know that's a lie.
What's needed is conscious action and its then you break down and cry.
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